Charming, but single

A journal in dates and drinks


Conversations about ghosts

“I met the nicest guys the other night. It’s a shame you couldn’t meet us out,” Single Girl said, relaying her adventures from a night that turned from dinner into drinks into staying out late. “Yeah, I just couldn’t go out. I was too tired,” I said. “Cute?” “Very. I got their numbers.” “Oh! How is your man?” I asked. Single Girl had been seeing someone casually for a few weeks. They’d gone out on several dates and he’d come around to meet us for drinks. A PhD candidate and professor, he was polite and funny and smart and easy to talk to. I definitely approved of him as a potential boyfriend. “OH! I don’t think he’s my man,” she said. “I haven’t heard from him since last Saturday.” “What happened? We just got drinks together last Thursday! And you left with him. He is so nice [Single Girl].” “I don’t even know. We didn’t hang out on Friday because he was working on a big paper, but we talked on Saturday. He told me to call him after I was finished with dinner, and I assumed he wanted to hang out and take a break from work,” she said. “Right, sounds normal so far.” “And then when I called him he was very rude and short with me because he said I’d interrupted him,” she said. “Um, then why did he tell you to call him? Why did he answer the phone if he was in the middle of something? He shouldn’t get angry at you after he asked that you call him.” “I have NO idea. And he was all huffy to me when he said goodbye, so I just hung up without saying goodbye. But I felt bad about that later so I sent him a text message saying that I was sorry for just hanging up and that I hoped his paper was going well.” “Right, ok, that’s forgivable,” I said. “And?” “And nothing, I haven’t heard from him. To smooth things over I sent him a text the next day when his football team won. And still nothing.” “That makes no sense. You did what he told you to do and he got mad at you,” I said. “He’s just obviously not relationship material. Because if he was too busy to talk, he should have politely apologized and said he was working on a big project and that we could hang out another night. In fact, even if he called today I wouldn’t date him anymore,” she said. I admired her for standing her ground. She wasn’t going to let a guy be rude to her for no reason, especially after they’d had a few dates. If I were in that situation, I thought, I’d make excuses for his behavior and wish that he would call and forget that he’d be impolite. “I’m just glad I found out now and not six months down the line. But it does suck,” she said. “We’ll just pretend he died,” I said. “What?” “We’ll just pretend he died and no one told you. And then you don’t have to think he didn’t call. Because he couldn’t call. Because he died,” I said. “I love you. You are a great friend.” “This is what I did with The Nurse,” I said. “Until I saw him -- I mean, his ghost -- at the grocery.” “Oh! I saw him the other day when I was at work at the hospital,” she said. “Really? How did he look?” “Like the ghost of a man who wasn’t good enough for you,” she said. “I love you. You are a great friend.”



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Charming, but single is 25 26 27(!), lives in the Southern part of the U.S.A. and likes both her drinks and her boys tall. E-mail (listed below) her and she may respond. You can also IM her in AIM/AOL. (If she ever remembers to sign on.)
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Former taglines of this blog: "A Journal in Dates and Drinks" and "A Dateless Journal of Drinking."




Those Particulars
Some Backstory
Memories of the Way We Were
Updates and Towel Snapping
One Year Wrap-Up
Just As She Is
An Open Letter to Myself
After 26 years, she HAS learned something
An Open Letter to the Men Who Message Me Through Match
Sharing a smoke



Associated Content Interview with Charming
The Hindu: Blog Sisters are here

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