I talked to the Relief Worker last night. He's getting settled into his new digs a few hours from here. It was nice to hear from him, as we'd been playing a bit of phone tag.
We only talked for a little while. The conversations we have fit the same structure:
Say hello and flirt.
Relief Worker compliments S.
S blushes and says thanks.
Flirt some more.
Update on S's day at work.
Update on the Relief Worker's Day at work.
Relief Worker compliments S again.
Cell phone cuts out.
Relief Worker says he'd like to see S again.
S affirms that she would like that.
Flirt and say goodbye.
We're not having hour-long conversations. We have a lot to say when we hang out, but I feel slightly awkward on the phone. It's just odd.
Best Friend Ever said to just go with it.
I guess I'm questioning my interest. I mean, if I were really interested, wouldn't I be moving heaven and earth to go see him for a weekend? I think I'm worried that our differences in belief, religion and creed are more than I'm willing to work to overcome.
He's just so well-behaved and gentlemanly and polite. I like all of those things, but I don't mind someone who misbehaves every now and again (if you know what I mean).
I feel like I'm worried too much about this. It is as if I'm worried about being too judgmental about someone's beliefs or too stubborn to even consider dealing with them. Being judgmental and stubborn is generally considered a negative thing, but maybe I should go with these feelings.
Do I not go forward because I'm worried about future conflict based on (what I am assuming) is a Great Divide in feelings on the appropriateness of certain behavior between consenting adults? Or do I wait until I reach the Great Divide and risk feelings being hurt and arguments being had?
I'm thinking about this too much, I know I am.