Charming, but single: An Open Letter to Myself on the Occasion of Halloween

An Open Letter to Myself on the Occasion of Halloween

Published by charming, but single on 10.31.2005 at 10/31/2005 01:59:00 PM.

Dear S,

Please do not act like a tramp tonight. Just because it is Halloween and you have a cute new silky camisole and sexy new pointy boots does not mean that you need to act like a common streetwalker.

Sure, it seems like a good idea to get all dressed up and go out and act silly because it's Halloween and you can get away with it. But have we learned nothing from events of Halloweens past? The show disasters, the costume malfunctions, the hangovers from hell ...

Take last Halloween, for example. Was there any reason to drink all of that vodka? Also, the boy? Was that necessary? I think not!

You are an adult now and I think it is high time that you stopped carrying on like a trollop on Halloween, just because it is socially acceptable to dress a touch sluttier than normal under the guise of being "in costume." (Because, really, it is high time that you stopped using Halloween as an excuse to buy a new outfit that you can "costume up" with random animal ears or a witches hat.)

Also, you should really not wear the devil tail you purchased to go with the devil ears you purchased to match your sexy red shirt (a.k.a. "Devil Costume"). You know that wearing a tail on Halloween is merely a ploy to get people to pay attention to your ass. So predictable! So cheesy! So blech!

And shots? Are you 21? Grow up!

Just a little pre-emptive damage control.

Sincerely,

Charming, but single is 25 26 27(!), lives in the Southern part of the U.S.A. and likes both her drinks and her boys tall. E-mail (listed below) her and she may respond. You can also IM her in AIM/AOL. (If she ever remembers to sign on.)
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