Charming, but single

After a salad and a glass of wine too many, I went with Southern Belle and her boyfriend and two of her coworkers to a newly opened bar. I was underwhelmed by this overcrowded hole in the wall. I already HAVE a random, hole-in-the-wallish place, about two blocks away, much bigger and with a better crowd. Ordered a Sauvingon Blanc. (More expensive and less tasty that at the OTHER bar, natch) As we fought for barstools and watched the crowd of late-twenty-somethings and early-thirty-somethings jockey for the bartenders' attention, I sang along to the jukebox. A nice mix of 80s songs with some classic rock and a touch of real-good country. (Johnny Cash, Hank Williams, Jr.) "I don't get it," I said as, I sipped my wine and scanned the crowd. "Don't get what?" Southern Belle asked. "Every day, I see all kinds of women who are just terrible trolls," I paused. "And THEY'RE married." Southern Belle laughed and patted my arm, as if to say, "No heavy thinkin' while drinkin', lady." "Maybe they're really good in bed?" "No," I said. "They're not. They're just TERRIBLE FRIGID TROLLS."